Women, question about your sexuality....?

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from what i gather from most women here, yes, most women DO lust and desire s*x. my question is, what are the requirement for a guy before sexual thoughts about him are arousing and not disgusting?

for most guys, sexual thoughts about any decent looking woman are arousing. how does it work for women? what kinds of guys specifically are you aroused when you have sexual thoughts about? be specific. what physical features do they need to have? how old do they tend to be? does there need to be some emotional connection or do looks alone do it?

be 100% honest.




  1. Most of my sexual thoughts are about guys I find attractive, but sometimes it's nothing to with looks, it could be intelligence or humour or a nice voice...anything and everything.

    In general I find men with dark hair and slim but well-toned bodies to be physically attractive. They are usually a few years older than me (I'm 20). And as for emotional connection...F*ck no, that's totally irrelevant for me.

  2. Its all about personality.  If the guy doesn't have one he'll be ignored.

  3. Okay, I will be honest. There are attractive men who act like stupid jerks and I am not aroused at all. Then there are attractive men that look at me a certain way, talk to me a certain way. A nice, good looking guy came up to me once, put his hand on my shoulder, and told me he liked my comments in class. One day I had a hair appointment and I walked in late to work. This average guy looked up at me, smiled and said with a lot of enthusiasm, I really like your hair. It looks great! Both of these scenarios were done in front of others and seemed really sincere. I started paying attention to both of these guys and ignored the better looking ones who didn't put themselves out there. Okay and also, I don't care what the h**l you look like, if you can play the guitar or if you are a musician, that is d**n s**y!! Learn to play the guitar and if you can sing, even better!!

  4. For me, personality comes into it a LOT.  For example, while I might note the attractiveness of a lot of male celebrities, they don't enter my fantasies until I sort of get a "feel" for who they are.  Pretty boys with no personality might be nice to look at, but I don't have that tingle that makes me want to have s*x.

    If I just see a handsome guy, I'm not all that crazy about him unless he's interesting looking (i.e. he has something that sets him apart from all the other good-looking guys).  Oftentimes, that means not being "classically" handsome- but then again, I tend to be drawn to slightly nerdy guys and whatnot, instead of your basic fratboy.  If there's a lot skin exposed (like at the pool or something), and it's s**y, my thoughts might stray a little more towards the gutter than they usually do.

    I don't know if that helped, but hopefully!

  5. It's much simpler than that. We tend to think of whichever guy we're already sleeping with. Or if we're not sleeping with someone at the moment, it's someone we've slept with before. Or maybe it's just someone completely random that we happen to find attractive. It's not some kind of paf-by-numbers game.

  6. There is something very, extremely attractive about a man who has confidence. Not an arrogance that can't be questioned, but a confidence that invites constructive input... it's hot to the point of being nearly annoying. Annoying because guys like that tend to have harems rather than girlfriends/wives. And if that person lets you know he is attracted to you, but doesn't make a move, every thought becomes arousing because anticipation keeps building.

    For me, the emotional connection is mandatory... at least so far. And innuendo combined with a soft voice knocks me out.

    As for the repulsive part:

         addictions - not attractive

         controlling behavior - not attractive

         promiscuity (especially with ANYONE I know) - not attractive

    And of course, a certain amount of hygiene is expected.

  7. Rio Madeira is stereotyping all women. Everybody, regardless of their s*x, differs and there is no single answer to put everybody under.

  8. Everyone has different likes and dislikes so it can't be generalised. Some people have a higher s*x drive and we all find different things attractive.

    There isn't a set requirement. I personally don't find Brad Pitt attractive but I find Bruce Campbell so s**y which most people don't lol.

    When it comes to fantasizing about s*x, it's mainly just celebrities, people in 'real life' who are attractive I don't think about because (and my hubby feels the same way about women) it's like cheating.

    it's fine to have fanatasies about eclerbities because they are just that.

  9. Hero man! I have found the answer to your quest :-D

    *hey Rio, you hit the thousand+ mark on best answers, applause!

  10. I find lots of different types of men attractive. I can't really define what makes them attractive. I don't generally like the pretty boys because they're too stuck on themselves. Frat boys scare me. And the rugged outdoorsy types don't do much for me because I figure they want to go out in the woods and kill something. I like the geeky types, and I DIE for Goths. The only thing that really turns me off is bad hygiene.

    Still, I don't usually go home and dwell on some nice-looking guy I've seen. I see him, think "he'd make a nice toy," and then forget about him. There has to be an emotional connection for me to start thinking of a guy sexually.

  11. I have a lot of male friends and I would consider sexual thoughts about most of them disgusting. It's not that they're all unattractive, but it's kind of a betrayal of friendship to think about a friend in an objectifying manner, and since I'm in a monogamous relationship it WOULD be objectifying-- I'm not looking for romance.

    For me, sexual thought doesn't center around looks but around feeling. For instance, when I'm thinking about my boyfriend and what I like about him on a purely sexual-attraction level, it's mostly about how he holds me and how he touches me than about how he looks, TBH. His personality definitely does play a part in it, too-- I like knowing that he cares about me and I like trying to guess what he's thinking when we're making out, etc.

  12. I'm not trying for best answer but two things come to mind;

    There are sexual appetites between the sexes

    And two, there is an attraction between boys and girls as people, I mean liking someone as a person not as a thing

  13. I can only speak for myself, and I have to have a connection with the person I have s*x with. I did a few silly romps with guys I dated for about a month or so in my younger days, but I don't want that - it's pointless.

    Yea, I want s*x. I lust for my guy. But I'm not randomly lusting after cute ones I see at bars or anywhere else. I look and think, "d**n he's hot". But that is about it. I don't want to take him home!

    I'm in love with my bf; I think he's very handsome, and love the thought of him touching me. It gives me chills and... ok - I will leave it at that.

  14. Well to be honest with you. I don't have a sexual preference. With me it's what's on the inside that matters. Intelligence, (not know-it-alls) is what is s**y to me. I mean I'm not looking for an Einstein but I'm not look for a s**y jock that is in the mirror all day and can't find his way out of a paper bag. I like guys that have more to offer than a baby face and blue eyes.

  15. Okay, this is a long, complicated question ... I know this isn't what you want to hear, but what I find attractive can vary a LOT depending on how I feel at the time. My s*x drive really fluctuates, so some days NOBODY arouses me, and some days EVERYONE (well nearly everyone) arouses me.

    But I'll just take it as a typical normal day.

    * Requirements? Well, he just has to be reasonably attractive to me. I'm not that fussy!

    * The guys that tend to attract me most physically are slim and dark-haired, but they don't have to be. I've been attracted to blonds, redheads and light brown hair as well. Chubby guys can be very cute sometimes.

    * They don't NEED to have it, but I'm most attracted to long faces, large noses and big eyes. I also have a weakness for curly hair, freckles and facial hair (not all at once). I like men with interesting faces that have character:  a big turn-off for me is weak features. I'm not particularly attracted to the big, burly he-man type with bulky muscles and so on.

    * Probably late 20s to early 50s as a general rule, when it comes to age.

    * There doesn't need to be an emotional connection for a passing fancy, but when there is an emotional connection the attraction becomes much stronger. The stronger the emotional connection, the less important physical attributes become.

    * Yes there are many attractive men I don't have sexual thoughts about. I think George Clooney is a handsome man and he seems very nice as well, but he doesn't do much for me. And yes, there are many "average" or even "ugly" men that drive me crazy ... and I'm not telling who!

    * Personality is very important if you know the person, but not at all if it's just someone on the street and only a little if it's a celebrity. There's someone I know who isn't really my type much at all and is only ordinary-looking, but he has such a s**y personality that I think he is one of the hottest guys I've ever met. (And yes my husband knows about it and thinks it's funny, so don't nag me on that!)

    * Well definitely pre-pubescent as a cut-off point for sexual arousal. But it's very rare for me to find anyone sexually attractive younger than mid-20s (I'm not claiming it never happens). And even then such feelings might well be mixed with maternal emotions and would probably be very weak and pass quickly from my mind.

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