Is a happy, life-long marriage possible!?

Question

Im 18 and have wanted to get married since I can remember.

However, these days I cannot go a week without hearing about another divorce, couples cheating, separation, whatever. A friend of mine just found out her mom has been having an affair for 8 years, another friend just told me her parents are considering divorce because they both are miserable, its all I hear about lately!! Then recently my parents have been going through tough times and there may be some affairs going on. I mean maybe I don't even want to get married it is bound to end in failure! It seems that nobody is happy with one person for the rest of their lives, they all cheat! I am so afraid of this because all I used to think about was my dream husband and how happy we would be together FOREVER, but maybe its just a dream :/

any thoughts?? comments?

Answer 1

It is possible, sweetie, don't give up hope.  Just don't be so in love with the idea of being in love that you can't see the forest for the trees.  Don't get engaged to a guy that you have serious problems with when you are dating him.  Realize that it isn't just walking off into the sunset--real marriage takes work, compromise, and commitment.  After the vows are exchanged, you realize that the dream man farts, scratches himself, and doesn't wipe his pee dribbles off the toilet.  The divorce rate is 50-60% these days, which is scary, but that still means that 40-50% are making it.  One set of my grandparents would have been married 60 years in January if my grandmother hadn't recently passed away.  The other set is somewhere between 55 and 60 years, as well, and my parents, my husband's parents, and all of my brothers in law's  parents have stayed together.  My husband and I are going on 5 years now, and, if I do say so myself, still going strong.  So, have hope and know what kinds of behaviors are the proverbial deal breaker for you so that you could end unhealthy relationships before they turn into marriage.

Answer 2

My nonna and nonno have been married since their early twenties, I wasn't around so I can't stay it was perfect back before I was born but I've never heard a bad story about them fighting or anything, so I like to think it's possible =)